31 March 2011

Please Take Me Away?

i don't want to live in this house anymore.
i've became a victim in this place since i was a kid.
i hate this.
i feel like crying. but i can't.
i am worried.
i don't know what that monster will do to my mom if i wasn't here anymore.

mom, i'm sorry. i know that you're sad. but i'm not a nice daughter that can comfort your heart. i'm getting worried about so many things. including you. you deserves someone that much more better than that monster! why do you have to face this??? i can't stand it anymore! it's no use to have a father that consider himself as someone that was so 'ALIM' but actually a cruel human who never try to care about his daughter and wife feelings! it's not money that we want! we want your gentleness towards us! please treat us like your family! not slaves!

now, how can i leave my mom like this??? i have to continue my study no matter what, but how??? how am i gonna continue if my mom continuously being treated as a slave in this house by her own husband??? please help me.
please help us facing this obstacle in this life. what should i do??? maybe i'm the one who will die first before them. i'm not that strong to face all of this.

what am i supposed to do???


stupid fans who believe 'TVXQ', 'Yunho', 'YunJae' n 'Changmin' will make Jae feel upset...
come here...
this the second time i'm placing this picture on my blog.
you know what?
i think maybe TVXQ is a SENSITIVE topic for Jaejoong ne? hm???
it is SENSITIVE huh???
then if it is SENSITIVE, why does Jaejoong change his bio to "JYJ from TVXQ"???
*crossing her hands*
can you please EXPLAIN to me???

30 March 2011



sorry guys... i was just... i was so shocked. REALLY SHOCKED!

those who turn on the 8TV on 9-10pm was damn so lucky!
i only turn it on 10 minutes before it ends. ;_____;
you know what is it???
It's Music on 8tv.
and there is....

okay... the actual title?
the legend of DBSK.
DAMMIT!!!! T_____T
why....? why....am i so unfortunate...
but, watching the last 10mins still make my heart thumping like crazy.
i feel like screaming at that time but i can't because my father was there.

p/s: is there someone record it on a camera? let me watch pls?
i'm so desperate am i?


okay, DBSK fans!!!
who doesn't feel happy with this???!!!
who??? You???
c'mere i smack your head!

do you understand with the picture???
no??? okay.
it says, "JYJ from TVXQ"
Jaejoong!!! I love you!!!

i started to have a feeling.
a feeling that tells me that they will be together again.
sooner or later. i don't care.
I will be waiting for them.
I will keep on believe in them.
I will always keep the faith!

p/s: if this really happen, what do you wanna say, antis???

Love JYJ, But Hate HoMin.

oh no.. wait... wait!!!!
*everyone throwing rubbish to her*
*runs while protecting herself from the rubbish*
*everyone stopped but still glaring on her*
i didn't even start the story yet! pls hear me first la! haish!

i'm not saying that i love JYJ but hate HoMin!
I love them both!
i'm talking about some JYJ fans that hate HoMin in here!
haish... *sit at her place back*

i'm kinda disappointed with some JYJ fans out there.
especially with a JYJ's fansite that i've followed on twitter.
for the first time i knew about this fansite, i love it.
because it's a JYJ's fansite. i can get their latest news easily.
but then, when i read their other posts about HoMin, i became so upset with their words towards our boys.
and now, i've stop following them.
i know, it won't give any effect to them. but it makes me feel relief. ^__^
there's other JYJ's fansite that still love HoMin. so, i don't have to worry~

i'm supporting both of them.
i will keep on believe in them.
i will keep on waiting for them.
I will Always Keep The Faith Just For Them!

Hope To The End!

p/s: hey, pay me back for what you have done to me! *puff her cheek*

Using BOTH... o.o

can I???
or should i just use both my Blogger and LJ?
i think i will use both. o.o
yep. i will use both.
it's decided.

Should I MOVE?

i was thinking about this recently...
yea, i have so many things to figure out right now.
being busy as a fan too. (ridiculous??? for me it's not)
yea, I AM BUSY!
laugh if you want to. i wanna laugh too. but i can't.
something stops me from being happy. too many things.

enough talk.
i was thinking about MOVING from Blogger to LiveJournal.
but i don't know when.
i have 2 blogs and i feel like i have to choose just one of them.
but i know that if i move, i won't be having so many friends like i did right now.
but... i find it easy to find more informations regarding DBSK/YunJae in LJ.
but... both are important to me.
i don't know what to choose.
maybe... i have to use both?
i don't know. it's my fault too.
but i won't regret it.
and why does this entry sounds serious???
maybe I AM SERIOUS at this time.

i should figure this out by myself...
or should i ask you, your opinions?

29 March 2011

Now... I'm Holding Back My Tears...

i seriously don't know what to say...
will i have the chance to see them even for once?
will the day where i can see them all 5 in front of my eyes come?
i really hope so that there's a chance for me to see them.
but what can i do? i really am hoping so that i can meet them.
even if it means that i have to go there alone.
i don't care! my family wants to stop me?!
stop me if they can! i don't care anymore if there's a chance for me to meet them!
i feel really glad if i can live there forever! even if i'm alone!
i want to meet them... i want to talk to them...
please fulfill my wishes!!!
i envied other fans that can meet them even though they're younger than me!
i hate to have a family that always wanna control their daughter even though she's already an adult!!!
WTF!!! i hate this really!
if i have a chance to go to another country especially Korea or Japan,
i will definitely go there even if it means i have to go there alone!
i don't care!!!
i wanna meet my beloved DBSK5 boys!!!
i miss them, dammit!
i love them!
i don't even have the courage to see their sad face!
i don't want to see that at all!
i wish, they're happy always!
i wish they'll be together again!!!
i feel like... i'm the only fan that can't meet them face to face.
i really want to talk with them like other fans can.
i really want to meet them like other fans can.
why am i so unfortunate???

i can only hold my tears back...

110328 All about JYJ (VID)

It's the making of Lotte Duty Free MV i guess.
hehe. they're so cute ne?
but... why Jaejoong look so serious???
smile... SMILE! don't make me sad. >.<
Yoochun can smile a lot!
you should smile too, Jae...
enough talk!
enjoy watching them enjoyed!

I Cried Before, But Now, I Feel Annoyed!

it's nothing guys. really.
but it's something to me.
if before this i cried over a fanfic,
now i'm getting annoyed over a fanfic.
it's not because of the spelling or grammar mistakes or whatsoever.
but the character in the fic. grrrrr!!!!
gaaaahhhhh!!!! i feel like i wanna scream right now!!!!
but unfortunately it's in middle of night!
if not, i'll scream out loud i don't care if anyone heard it!!!!
*panting hardly after all the screams*
if i can go into the fic, than i surely shove that character away!

28 March 2011


yea, i've made a mistake. and i hate it right now. =_=
how am i gonna fix this??? help!!!!

(_ _|||)

Seriously, I'm On The YunJae Side!!!

yea!!! Now I'm getting mad!!!
really mad!!! and of course, with the JYJ fans who kicks away HoMin. =_=

yea, what HeavensWine said is true!
and i have read it by my own self and soon i was like, "WTF?!"
okay, as i said, i don't think that Jaejoong will feel uncomfortable when the fans shouted 'Yunho' or 'YunJae' at him!
maybe some of it will make he feels uncomfortable like showing the photoshopped pictures of YunJae, and other NC17 pictures.... gah! you know what i mean!
some of them chant something about YunJae but not in a proper manner.
it's bad.

but, by shouting Yunho's name or YunJae, i don't think that Jaejoong will feel uncomfortable!
just like i said before, even Jae's sister supports YunJae, so, why should this thing be so sensitive for him???
why should Jae's sister support something that will make her brother feel upset or uncomfortable???
geez! think before you said something!

and regarding what Shane Yoon said,
"Sorry, they didn’t mention them at all to me.  To my understanding the whole situation was a little sensitive to them, so I didn’t bother bringing it up.  It seems like an unfortunate thing and I hope there is some resolve, at least for the sake of their friendships"...

it means, if he was asking something like, "hey, how are Yunho and Changmin right now?" or, "How was your relationship?" or any-questions-that-required-an-answer regarding them, it will definitely makes Jaejoong feels uncomfortable right???
but, chants are just the way to show that we still support them.
and we still believe in them no matter what happened.
we don't need any answers for the chantings.
we just show our supports.
gah! i'm getting confused over here!
but, i hope that you'll understand this. >__<

and... some pictures shows that Yunho and Jaejoong have the same things like necklace, brooch, shoes, and even shirt and jacket!
what do you think of that???
they still meet each other secretly?
i was hoping they are.
if i use my YunJae mind in here, i would say, "omg! they still meet each other!!! and even exchange their things with each other!!!" like that.
but... if i use my logical-like-minded, "it wasn't that they meet each other or exchanged their things with each other, but it was just gifts from fans. and some stuffs are just been stored by the costume designer or whatsoever it is!"
but i was hoping that they still meet each other even it means, 'secretly'.
i don't know what am i talking about.

i will seriously keep on believing in YunJae and DBSK no matter what.
JYJ n HoMin are still DBSK in my heart.
why must we hate one of them but love another while when they're still DBSK5, we love them all???
what the heck is happening to the fans???
i don't understand this at all.
thanks to someone that support what i've comment on Youtube.
i won't cry if it wasn't because i miss DBSK so much.
but i won't blame HoMin or JYJ for what had happened.
because, something that happens have their own meanings.
maybe God wanted to give them something that much more greater than what they have right now and before this?
who knows?

Let's Keep The Faith


okay!!! i just remembered about something!!! (O^O)

today, i've gone to Shah Alam with my cousin, uncles, and my mom.
there's a wedding ceremony at the Intekma Resort.
omgosh! i love that place! so pretty!
but... damn! so HOT! DX
argh! just forget about that!

what i'm gonna tell you guys in here is...
argh! i think that i'm getting crazy!
on the way home, when we were at Bangsar or... somewhere near there...er... i don't know!
there's a big ads board at the side of the road. a really BIG one. lol
i don't know why... but... it really shocks me!
i was like, "OMFGcrazyhell!" lol.
and, "is that... JAEJOONG????!!!!"
the model! the model really looks like JAEJOONG!!!! OMFG!
seriously! O___O

but... i was hoping it wasn't him.
or... i will ask someone to put it down and just give it to me that damn advertisement board! lol! XD
omg... seriously... it's not Jaejoong right???
but...if it was him, then, i'm proud of my country! aha! XD
even though i actually hate my country... (-_-)

okay, that's all for today's craziness!

27 March 2011

Message For YunJae Fans! From Jae's Sis...

hello guys, and girls.
yea, especially girls. or fangirls? :P
when you came into my blog,
than you could see that i'm supporting....
i love them!!! (o>∀<)o~♥

and... recently, there's some bad news around us.
not YunJae who brings it. but the fans.
the insane fans. (-_-)
as you know, it's about Jaejoong who will get sad if the fans keep on shouting 'Yunho' or 'YunJae' to him. o_0
i don't think so...
but for more information regarding this matter,
you can easily go here.
it's HeavensWine's reports again~ :3

what i want to show here is...
A message from Jae's sis. :)
"Please always keep your YunJae love. YunJae are really thankful to you"
picture credits: YunJaeTik.com

in this case, i was thinking...
why does 'Yunho' or 'YunJae' will make Jae feel uncomfortable?
while his sister is a YunJae lover too? o_0
(I love you, unnie~ XD)
who makes the story???
okay, just read HeavensWine's reports already. >.<

please let this nightmare ends already!!!

DBSK - Hey! (Don't Bring Me Down!)


Give it away, give it away now

Nal tteonaran dal ijeneun kkeutjiran mal
Eonjena hagoshipeun daero nareul umjikyeodo
Neowi tujeongil ppun iraneun geollaneun ara
Nega geureohdago dallajineun geoseun eobseo

Call up, call up
Ije geuman nareul shiheom hajima
Call up, Call up
Geumoseube naega himdeuljanha
Yeojadeureun wae jakku hwaginbatgoshipeo
Namjadeuri mameul heundeulkka o yeah~

Jeonghaejyeobeorin geot cheoreom miraekkaji boindamyeon neomu jaemi eobgetjjiman (ohhh, oohhh)
Maeil gateun mal maeil gateun shig wi pyohyeondo byeollo jaemi eobjanha

* (I Say) Hey! don’t bring me down
Geujeo geureon namjaro mandeuljima
Saranghaneun beobeul aneun namjaramyeon
Eonjena meomchwo itjji anheun gireul seontaek hae

(I say) Hey! don’t bring me down,
Cheol saegateun namjaro bojima
Majimak sungani (my only girl~)
Neo wi sarami nugu inji jikyeobwa

Give it away, Give it away, Give it away now.
Give it away, Give it away, Give it away now.

Hanneun pal saenggakdo hajimallan mal
Yeojeonboda aejeongi shigeottdaneun mal
Neonun wae geureohke sojunghan nae gachido
Ajik moreuneun geoya

(Jashin eopseo boyeo)
Eoulliji anheun mal
(Jeongmal moreugetni)
You don’t know what loving you
(Jeongmal moreugetni)
Meoributeo malkketkkaji neo wi modeun geoshi nareul sarojaba beorin geol

(Neo wi gyeoteseo jeoldae balkkori cheoreom mwohan naega dwigoshipjianha)
Maeil gateun mal, maeil gateun shig wi pyoheyondo byeollo jaemi eobjanha

*(I Say) Hey! don’t bring me down,
Geujeo geureon namjaro mandeuljima
Saranghaneun beobeul aneun namjaramyeon
Eonjena meomchwo itjji anheun gireul seontaek hae

(I say) Hey! don’t bring me down,
Cheol saegateun namjaro bojima
Majimak sungani (my only girl~)
Neo wi sarami nuguinji jikyeobwa~

Dashi nareul heundeureo bol saenggakhajimara itneun geudaero wi nareul jikyeo
I need a girl, so need you love… (mworaeni yaejigeum)
Saramdeuri shiseone matchwo nareul gachieobneun namjaro mandeul ryeogo hajima
I need a girl, i need a girl, i need you girl

*(I Say) Hey! don’t bring me down,
Geujeo geureon namjaro mandeuljima
Saranghaneun beobeul aneun namjaramyeon
Eonjena meomchwo itjji anheun gireul seontaek hae

(I say) Hey! don’t bring me down,
Cheol saegateun namjaro bojima
Majimak sungani (my only girl~)
Neo wi sarami nuguinji jikyeobwa~

(I need a girl)
(I need you, girl)

SiChul Sweet Couple~~!! (/°∀°)/

Here comes!!! More picture spamming~~!!! XD
now it's time for SiChul~~
what is SiChul??? it's Siwon n Heechul~ hiks! >w<

Heechul seriously love to make 'peace' sign. :P
and he's pretty too.
i'm getting jealous over him. :\
Should i say that above pictures are the backstage pictures?

okay, now... another cute pictures of them!!! XD
in front of the camera~

omo!!! kawaii~~~ XD
look how close is Siwon and Heechul~
i wonder what does Heechul's hair smell. :P
and they're on the bed too... haha! lol

yep... Siwon. protect your hyung. :P

cutey~~~ XD

i don't know but... should i say that Heechul is a 'GIRL'??? D:
even though he's hiding his face but, you still can tell how pretty is he!
Siwon must be really love to see his hyung's face! XD

Heechul should wear a skirt in this picture. haha! lol.
Cinderella and his Prince~ :3

i bet, if both of them walking on the street with above kind of appearance,
where people doesn't know about them so much,
some people may say, "aww~ look, he's girlfriend is so cute~~~"

aaahh~~ kawaii ne... :3

hehe. Siwon, you seriously enjoying this huh? >w<
and Heechul too~

i seriously love this pairing!
even though they are just doing some fanservice,
or just showing their brotherly love,
but it's still cute!
well, who doesn't love this pairing anyway???

picture credits: Google, and their respective owners. :3

25 March 2011

I've Changed?

some of my friends said that,
"hey, you've changed aren't you?"
is not that they said that My appearance have changed or what.
but... My attitude maybe??? who knows. I don't know either.
THEY said that I've become ARROGANT???
owh, seriously??? am I???
owh c'mon! who start it first?
ME or YOU???
I'm not someone who likes to argue about things.
so, the simple way is to run away or just ignore someone that bring ME tons of problems!
that's me NOW! I'm not the OLD me!

who am I wanna be, is up to ME.
it's not YOU who gonna control MY life!
Accept ME as who I am, or just leave ME alone!
I'm a COLD HEARTED person???
yea, I AM!


My Wish Came True. but...

hello guys... how do you do?
i'm fine maybe.
my head hurt so much due to lack of sleep. =_=
and when i tried to get some more sleep just now, my mom keep on nagging to me and keep on waking me up it makes my head hurt more and more. grrr.

hm... remember my wish on yesterday's post?
if you've read it, then you knew it.
i wish i can dream about DBSK right?
you can find it on my post at the last paragraph.

it came true. seriously!
i had a dream about them!
but... it wasn't what i wished for.
i don't want to ask you to believe me but...
almost all of my dreams, came true.
but i hope that this one will never came true!!!
i dreamed on something bad!!!
something bad will happen!
but... i don't know.
i don't know when it will happen.
but... it makes me worried about them.
omg. please!!!
i'm so scared!!!

this kind of thing always occurred on me.
what they call it?
Déjà vu?
sometimes, it makes me happy.
and sometimes, it makes me worried.
but someone said that, when you dreamed about something bad,
something opposite of that will happened.
if it's true, i wonder what will happen to them.
just wait and see.
maybe there's a good news?

i don't know...
people said that dream always be a dream,
whether it's bad or good.
but for me, even if i don't want to believe it,
it always came true.
i don't know. maybe it's just my feelings.
yea, maybe.

24 March 2011


you've been warned!

YunJae lovers... please prepare bunch of tissues!
i wonder if you can watch this without crying!

i miss YunJae...
and this video... i guess, i need another more tissues right now.
whenever i heard their song 'Love In The Ice',
it reminds me of YunJae more and more and more!
the reason why Jaejoong always look at his left side is because of one person ne?
and this song tells everything.
just watch it and you know what i mean...

I miss them so much until i forgot about my own self!
i'm regretting this.
i regret because i started to love them more when they're not together anymore.
i started to know them more after all of this happened.
i regretted my old days.
why don't i know them earlier???
i miss them so much it hurts.

please, DBSK, come back as 5 once again!
i will keep on waiting for them!
i'll be waiting even if it means forever!
YunJae Hwaiting!
DBSK Hwaiting!


*please let me dream about them*
*please let it be a good sign for them, for us, for everyone*
*please, let me, even for once*

Jaejoong... Hiding Something???

*thinking mode on*
hurm... i'm getting curious over this video.
what is exactly he's hiding from us? hurm...
well, you see, he seems like he gonna do some illegal business.
watch the way he knocked the car's door.
3 times first, then 2 times.
a secret code? :P
is there something in there?

they said that it was on the White Valentine's day... hurm...
this is suspicious ne? *evil grin*
in my mind full of YunJae-ness, i think it was Yunho who's inside the car! XD
kyaaaa!!! if it's really Yunho, then...........
call me crazy. i don't care!


Shou-san~ he's pretty isn't it??? *__*

okay guys... i know, i've stop being a J-rockers lover for some times but now....
I'm addicted to SHOU-san from A9! XD
i just can't stop looking at him! lol.
i even dreamed about him a long time ago (hope that it will come true).
i don't know what to say but...
yea, Shou's cute n pretty. *-*
Now... I just have a feeling to spam this entry with his pictures! lol!

his big eyes. should i say... he's cute? XD
omo... he looks like a girl in here. o.o

omg!!! someone! please tell me that this is just a drawing!
how can he look so gorgeous??!!! O__O
he's a guy! but... he's so pretty~~ >.<
and i'm jealous. :\
Shou+white=pure angel!omg! >w<

okay! i have to stop this before something bad happen!
i don't want to pay your medical bills...
sore jaa~!

p/s: i wish that A9 members are alright right now.
keep healthy, guys!
Peace, n Smile!

Let's Walk Together